DIRTY ROCKER: A Rock Star Romance Read online

  Shock wheeled through me. “But…but I’m not cured yet. I might never be cured.”

  “Doesn’t matter. We had hot sex tonight, didn’t we? Much as I’d like to fuck you with my cock—and I never thought I’d be saying this—penetrative sex isn’t the be all and end all.”

  It was like a great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. He loved me as I was, hang-ups and all. I kissed him on the lips and said, “I’d love to marry you.”

  “We can go shopping for a ring tomorrow, if you like?”

  “Was that the surprise you’ve been keeping secret from me?” I just had to ask.

  He smiled. “That’s for me to know and for you to find out…”

  “Oh, okay.” I chewed at my lip. “Will I find out soon?”

  “First thing tomorrow,” he smirked.

  Chapter 20

  Pierce

  Hayley downloaded the short e-book I’d read and devoured it in one go while we ate breakfast the following morning. “I’d given up searching for info,” she said, pouring us both a cup of coffee. “It’s so cool you found this.”

  I ran my hands through my hair, flipping it back from my face. “Not the only thing I found…”

  “You mean my surprise?” Her golden irises glowed.

  “Got it in one.”

  Her fiery tresses was in a braid again, but I let it pass. She’d need it tied back for what I had planned. I picked up my shades and cellphone, then sent a message to Joe to meet us in the lobby. I grabbed Hayley’s hand and pulled her to her feet. “C’mon. Time for the fun to begin…”

  Downstairs, Joe stepped in front of us and led the way to the underground parking lot. “These what you wanted, boss?” he indicated toward three single speed bikes.

  Hayley’s eyebrows shot up and she gave a squeal of excitement. “Oh, wow!” Without preamble, she flung her arms around me. “I love your surprise.” Her smile went straight to my heart. “I love YOU.”

  “Right back at ya, sweetheart.” A warm fuzziness radiated through me. “Wanna go for a ride?”

  “Sure do.” She went to the nearest bike and started adjusting the seat. “Where’d you get them?”

  “Joe found a rental place” I glanced at him. “Thanks, mate.”

  He grinned. “The security guard will let us out when we’re ready.”

  The three of us put on the helmets hanging from our bicycle handles. Joe was coming with us, of course, and would lead the way having gotten the route from the hotel concierge. The doors to the garage cranked open and hot, humid air covered us like a wet blanket as we cycled up the ramp. Outside, it was even hotter. Sweat prickled my scalp and trickled down the back of my neck.

  We headed south…passing swaying palm trees by the waterfront and futurist sculpture garden boasting sci-fi trees looking like they’d come straight from the movie Avatar. After cycling past massive greenhouses and more gardens, we arrived at a narrow dam. “It’s a barrage to block seawater from flowing into the marina and flooding low lying areas of Singapore,” Joe informed us. We took selfies but kept our shades and helmets on to prevent the public recognizing us. I stared across the bay toward the Singapore Flyer, a giant Ferris wheel that reminded me of the London Eye.

  The view from the top must be breathtaking.

  There were more tropical gardens on the other side of the marina, and we cycled through them before heading back the way we’d come. There’d been a secret motive for me bringing Hayley out here. I’d been scouting for a place to get down on my knees and propose to her formally, and now I thought I’d found the perfect spot. All we needed to do first was cool off in the pool before shopping for a ring.

  My thoughts chased each other as we rode in the direction of the hotel. Some would say that my asking Hayley to marry me had been impulsive, that I hadn’t thought it through. Except, I’d been wanting to tell her that I loved her since we’d gotten closer in LA but had argued with myself that my feelings hadn’t been real. When I’d realized I wouldn’t be able to carry on if we were no longer together, I knew it would kill me if we ever split up. Call me selfish, but I needed her. Needed her more than I’d ever needed the crutches of drugs and alcohol. I rubbed my sweaty palms down the legs of my shorts. I’d have to fess up to Hayley. Tell her what had made me so fucked-up that I’d become a coke head and a drunk. I resolved to tell her more about my past before I proposed.

  We parked our bikes back at the hotel and Hayley wrapped her arms around my waist. “Thanks, honey.” She gave me a hug. “That was so much fun.”

  I took off my helmet and shades, then looked her in the eye. “Wanna go for a swim in that awesome pool?”

  “Sure.” She wiped perspiration from her heart-shaped face. “It would be nice to cool off.”

  We ordered a sandwich lunch from room service, washed down with ice-cold lemon tea. After changing into our swimsuits and wrapping sarongs around ourselves, we grabbed some towels and headed up to the fifty-seventh floor…where we stretched out on a couple of chaise lounges under the shade of a palm tree on the decking jutting out over the water. There were several hotel guests up here, but the pool was so big it didn’t feel crowded and a surprisingly calm vibe helped us to chill.

  Joe joined us, saying he’d arranged for the bikes to be collected by the rental people. He told us that Axel, Phoenix, Camila, Jake, Ethan, and Violet had gone with Mike to visit the gardens and that Rhys, Zach and Liam were still nursing their hangovers from the excesses of last night. I would have been doing the same if Hayley hadn’t rescued me, I thought to myself. Did I really have so little self-control that I needed her to keep me on the straight and narrow? I blew out a breath.

  My heart thudding, I leaned toward Hayley and took her hand. “It’s time I told you more about myself, sweetheart.” I fixed her with my gaze. “When you hear what I’m about to say, you might change your mind about me…”

  Her amber eyes crashed into my blues. “Jesus, honey. I’d guessed there was something dark in your past. Nothing you say will make me stop loving you.” Her luscious mouth twisted. “When you love someone, you love them despite their faults.”

  We swiveled our bodies until we were facing each other, our feet on the decking and our knees touching. Then, I told her everything. About my dysfunctional family, how I’d found friendship with Danilo Ramos, how we ran drugs, robbed people’s houses, and threatened other kids with our knives, extorting money from them, and how I would have ended up in a juvenile detention center if it hadn’t been for my inspirational music teacher, Mr. Phillips.

  “He sounds amazing,” Hayley whispered.

  “Yeah. He arrived at my school a couple years before I was due to leave and ran an after-school club. A lot of us from the council estate started hanging out there instead of spending our time on the streets. That’s where I learned to play the guitar and drums.”

  “Did you make a clean break from the gang?” she asked, her gaze holding mine.

  “Not exactly.” I chewed the inside of my cheek. “Problem was, I owed Ramos money. Money I’d spent on buying myself a guitar and a set of drums to practice on at home.”

  She drew her brows together. “Did you manage to pay him back?”

  I shook my head. “There was no way I could do that. He wanted me to carry on running drugs for him. Said he’d wipe out my debt if I did.” I stopped. Searched for the right words… not that any words would be right for what I was about to say. “I refused. And the day I went into school to collect my grades, the exam results that would decide if I’d gotten into university, he was waiting for me outside the gates.” I paused again. Hard to speak with a clogged throat. “Danilo Ramos came at me with a knife.” My voice croaked. “We got into a fight. Mr. Phillips stepped in. Tried to break us apart. The knife meant for me stabbed him in the chest.” I released a long, slow, breath. “He died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.”

  “Oh, I’m so sorry.” She gripped my fingers, hard. Tears welled up in her eyes, and I brushed
them away with my thumbs.

  “My name was kept out of the press as I was underage. I kinda lost the plot for a while afterward. Got hooked on Valium. But I gave the police Ramos’ name and evidence of his criminal activities by video at his trial.” My shoulders slumped. “I didn’t turn eighteen until the following November. Somehow, I’d managed to start elementary school a year before I should have, due to my parents’ lying about how old I was so they’d get me out of the flat and off their hands.”

  Hayley let out a gasp. “No wonder you came under the influence of the wrong people…”

  “Yeah, it was Mr. Phillips who saved me. But I’ve carried the guilt for his death ever since.”

  “It wasn’t your fault,” she murmured.

  “I hate to contradict you, love, but it totally was. If you changed your mind about marrying me, it would kill me but I wouldn’t blame you. Not in the least.”

  “Hey, honey. Not gonna happen.” She put her arms around me. “Didn’t I tell you I loved you despite your faults? Not that I’m saying your teacher’s murder was your fault,” she clarified. “It must have been horrible for you.”

  I decided not to argue with her. She was only trying to comfort me. However, nothing she could say would change how I felt. If I hadn’t gotten involved with Ramos in the first place, Mr. Phillips would still be alive today, influencing kids to improve their lives. It was only Hayley’s love that made me feel slightly better about myself.

  “Let’s take a dip,” I said, changing the subject.

  We did as I suggested, swimming over to the edge of the pool, taking selfies with the Singapore skyscrapers as a backdrop. Of course we wouldn’t have fallen off—there was a hidden ledge below with railings—but the pictures made it look as if we could have.

  Soon we decided to head back to our room to get dressed. It was time to shop for Hayley’s ring in the Cartier store, which was conveniently located in the resort itself.

  The four-carat diamond solitaire was in a box in my pocket as I sat next to Hayley in the car Joe had rented. The jewelry shop had been great about closing momentarily while she’d chosen the ring. I guessed they’d milk the publicity for all it was worth, especially after I’d persuaded her to opt for four carats instead of one.

  Hayley was looking stunning, and I told her so. Dressed in a simple, sleeveless white linen dress, her hair reaching down to her waist, she knew what was about to happen, I think. I mean, it was obvious as I’d kept the ring after I’d paid for it, but at least I’d managed to keep the location secret from her.

  “Oh, awesome!” Her eyes shone as Joe rolled the car to a stop. “The Ferris wheel.” Her smile would light the world. “So much bigger than the one at Santa Monica…”

  “But perfect, don’t you think?”

  “Perfect.”

  I’d secretly booked the dining flight which included a four-course meal. I’d also paid to reserve the entire pod on the Ferris wheel so we’d have privacy. It was the size of a minibus and could have fitted at least ten people. Bloody lucky it wasn’t already taken. I hadn’t fancied sharing the venue with other couples.

  We went aboard and sat at our table, the host keeping his distance at the far end of the capsule while he prepared a Chinese meal for us.

  “You’re looking real handsome tonight.” Hayley raked her eyes over my beige linen suit. “I’ve never seen you so smart.” The white cotton dress shirt was open to my abs, showing the silver chain she’d given me. She reached across and fingered it.

  “I snuck out of our room while you were having a bath before getting ready. Went with Joe to an Armani store and got this specially for the occasion,” I smirked. “Nothing but the best for my girl.”

  Her blush was delightful. “I like that you left your hair loose like mine.”

  “Not too dirty rocker for ya?” I winked, spearing a chicken roll with my chopsticks.

  “Never.” Her eyes twinkled.

  We sat holding hands and picking at our food in air-conditioned comfort while we stared out at the setting sun. Gradually, the color of the sky changed from a golden glow to a bright dazzle of lights as Singapore lit up below us.

  “The view is incredible,” Hayley exclaimed as our pod reached the summit of the wheel. “Oh look!” she pointed. “You can see the dam we visited this morning.”

  Our flight would last for an hour, which was two rotations, and I’d already decided to wait until we’d gotten to the top on the second revolution before popping the question. So, we enjoyed our seafood soup, followed by prawns with braised noodles, and talked a little more about our families. Hayley told me about her relationship with her mum, who’d never asked her if she’d lost her virginity when she was breaking her curfew as a teen. She said that her dad had always been there for her, and a great father.

  “What about the other members of your family?” I inquired. “The aunt who came to your dad’s funeral?”

  “I remember spending a lot of time with her when I was a little kid. One day, when I was about eight years old, I think, she suddenly moved to Portland with the boys.”

  It wasn’t the time to delve deeper. We’d finished our dessert of mango panna cotta and our capsule was nearly at the pinnacle of the ride.

  I fingered the box in my pocket, my pulse skyrocketing. Taking in a deep breath, I got down on one knee in front of her. Nothing like doing this traditionally.

  She gave a little gasp. “Pierce…”

  I stared up at her, at this amazing girl. She was stunningly beautiful, and I loved her with all my heart.

  “Hayley Wilson,” I exhaled slowly. “Will you do me the honor of agreeing to marry me? I promise I’ll love you and care for you the rest of my life.”

  Without hesitation, she slipped to the floor and wrapped her arms around me. “Yes. Yes. Yes! I love you so much. And I’ll be your woman, in every sense of the word.”

  I slid the ring onto her finger, kissed the tears of happiness from her cheeks, then claimed her mouth with mine.

  Out of the blue, my cellphone chimed in my pocket.

  Fucking bad timing.

  I pulled it out and checked the caller ID.

  My bloody father. What the fuck did he want? He never called. This must be important.

  “Ramos has been released on parole, but has gone AWOL,” Dad came right out with it.

  I felt the blood drain from my face. “Thanks for letting me know.”

  “Who’s that floozy you’ve shacked up with?” Dad went on to ask in a snide tone. “I saw a picture of you both in Australia.”

  How dare he call Hayley that?!

  “None of your damned business.”

  “Mum asked me to say hello from her,” he ignored my remark. “She couldn’t speak to you as she’s gone out with her girlfriends…”

  Typical.

  “Listen, Dad. I’ve gotta go.”

  He cleared his throat. “Funds are a bit low here. Can you spare us another couple of thousand?”

  “Yes. Sure.” I knew if I didn’t cough up, he’d call the press and sell my story. It was an ever-present threat. “I’ll transfer it to your account.”

  I disconnected the call and put my arm around Hayley.

  “Is everything okay?”

  “Absolutely,” I lied. “Just the same old shit from my father.” I kissed her sweet lips. “Don’t want to let it spoil our engagement celebration.”

  I heard how flat I’d sounded but I couldn’t help it.

  My fucking past had come back to bite me. Just when I’d thought I might finally be able to live with it.

  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

  Chapter 21

  Hayley

  I was putting the finishing touches to my makeup in Pierce’s dressing room at Singapore’s National Stadium. Vanilla Sky had opened for ChiMera. I’d watched their entire set and almost all of CM’s before high tailing it backstage.

  I bit at my lips. The morning after Pierce had proposed, two nights ago, we’d told the band we’d
gotten engaged. They’d been happy for us…but Jake had been ecstatic. “I’ll arrange a press conference after the final concert here,” he’d smiled from one side of his face to the other. “Have you set a wedding date yet?”

  “We haven’t,” I’d said, and Pierce had interjected, “I’m leaving it to Hayley. We’ll tie the knot when and where she decides.”

  I’d have loved him even more for those words if that were possible, but my heart was already overflowing. I only wished he’d tell me what his dad had said. What had darkened his mood at the end of our magical ride on the Flyer. He’d clammed shut like the old Pierce and had brushed off my inquiry, saying it was nothing. I knew that it wasn’t and I’d promised myself I’d extract the information from him eventually. Maybe even after the impending interview, which we’d agreed to in exchange for not having to attend the after-show party.

  Warmth spread through me as I stared at the rock on my finger. The diamond was humungous and had cost thousands. I’d felt embarrassed by the extravagance, but Pierce had insisted and had melted me with that puppy dog look of his.

  I wriggled my ass on the plush sofa. The past couple nights in bed with him had been beyond amazing. With his help in loosening me up, I’d managed to insert not only my pinkie, but my index finger all the way inside. Not at the same time, that would have been too soon, but maybe one day in the not too distant future, my muscle would relax enough to take two fingers, followed by three, and last but not least, his cock.

  The door banged open and he strode into the room… all dirty and sweaty and looking like the rock god that he was. “Hey, babe. You look gorgeous. Are you ready to face the posse?”

  I’d glammed myself up a little and had let my hair down. “Ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.”

  He held out his hand, and I took it. “Let’s get it over with so we can go back to the hotel.”

  “That didn’t go too badly,” Pierce shrugged off his tee as we stepped into our suite an hour or so later. “You charmed the pants off them.”